Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize