It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
