I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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