In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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