insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Randomize
