i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
