bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
