And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Randomize
