Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
