She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Fuck appropriateness.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Randomize
