did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
