We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
