so explain again why im purple
no
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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