Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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