What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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