If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
