I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
