Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
