did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
