Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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