i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
