no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
