8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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