he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Come see our sink grown plant.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
