what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
