I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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