Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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