Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
