My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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