remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize