***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize