butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
