I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
