You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
