How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
