He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
