Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
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