My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
