His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
