At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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