My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
We're too hungover to prance.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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