I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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