hell yes lets make some ravioli
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
