remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
