Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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