The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
so much tequila, so little girl.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
