so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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