Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
