its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
