I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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